So today after months and moths of pretending to be happy and fine with everything that was going on around me I broke down. After months of not shedding one tear I finally did. I did because I don't know if I am the problem or everyone else is. I am not sure if I am the one to blame for all these things I feel right now. I don't really know what do now, should I keep pretending? should I make myself believe that everything is ok and i will be ok. Or should I try to solve try to see if I am the problem like I believe I am. At the moment I am really confused all I want to do is figure out a way to solve the way I am feeling right now. When I found myself about to break down today, and found no one to talk to that's when I realized I had no idea why I am like I am today. I am someone that has always lacked of trust to those surrounding me. I am that person that is never sure if she is being backstabbed or no. I am also that one that need to constantly ask a person to keep a secret for me, because I am always scared they will tell just the person I didn't want to find out about it. Know I am here in my house still thinking is it me? Because if it is then I need to find a way to fix it. To feel conftrable again.
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